• Thinking about how I’d never feared anything before, I thought that if it were impossible to fear for myself, using my fearlessness to help save people, people who deserved saving, would be the next best alternative.

    I had never feared anything in my life. Fear is too much of a ‘normal’ emotion. Being normal would never be my thing. Even if I was more ‘normal’ in certain ways I still would never fit in. I never would be ‘normal’, and in many ways I was thankful for that- the pros certainly outweigh the cons- but there was always a part of me that wished I could be ‘normal’ for just one day. I wasn’t one of a kind but I have never come anywhere close to finding someone like me, and it wasn’t likely that I would ever come close anyway. I just wished I could find one other person like me, I’m getting tired of sticking out like a sore thumb, I don’t even fit in with my family (and they aren’t exactly the most normal people ever, if you would even use the word people). All I ever wanted was just to blend in with the crowd, but that was never going to happen.

    In everyone’s, and when I say everyone I mean everyone ‘normal’, eyes I was ‘like an angel’. My mother always called me her little beauty, and my father said I looked like I’d stepped down from heaven, but he knew better than anyone that , that wasn’t the case. I had always wished that as a child I could have been normal. As the child I was, I grew up too quickly. I had to. My father has had to hide me from the world for my whole life. Until now at least, he decided that I have to go to school to finish off my schooling. I was scared. I hated attention, despised envy and I most certainly dreaded my first day of school. I was going to be the homeschooled freak, and I would never be able to just hide away to escape that. I was going to be noticed- and there was no denying that!

    I stared at myself in the mirror whilst passing a brush through my hair. I had waist length golden-brown curls flowing down my back, and I could imagine the comments I would receive on the topic of my hair. My hair grew so fast, I knew the silent taunts that would be running through their minds: hair extensions, way too many vitamins, and my favourite; just a plain freak of nature. I would never escape it, I’d hear the whispers, even if they never crossed any lips.

    As I was playing around with discrete styles I found one that made me look extremely like my mother used to. Most specifically my eyes. My father had always worried that my eyes would give the game away on our situation, There was no way I could have theses colour eyes if both my parents had golden brown eyes. Luckily, I don’t think anyone could remember my mother, so we were covered- to a degree. My eyes were not a normal colour, they were turquoise. They would probably have to be contacts. I wasn’t completely sure a normal person could have eyes like this- but I’m not, and I do so there’s no point lingering. My dark eyelashes, courteous of my father, framed my strange eyes with the effect of an extremely professional mascara job. So I looked like I was a completely fake supermodel, but I luckily was never one for make-up so my pale skin remained glowing under my features whilst my cheeks blushed my dads favourite colour, he said that it was the exact blush my mothers cheeks always had when she was embarrassed. My blush was almost permanent but burned a bright fuchsia when I was in situations where all the blood would rush to my cheeks. This would certainly be a problem tomorrow, walking around in a school full of kids glaring at the home-schooled freak isolated from everyone- I started to blush just thinking about it.

    I had only ever encountered school on TV shows. It seemed like quite an exciting place- more exciting than home-schooling at least!- but now it just seems like a scary place I’d rather not venture into. I only had a few years left, and I was miles ahead of my year anyway. I assured myself that the classes would be a waste of time, but I don’t think there’s anything sadder than a 16- year old with no friends and no social life, so I didn’t argue my point. He just wants me to finish my education properly, and if he should be so lucky, that I would get a boyfriend. I think I was probably the only teenage girl whose father was practically encouraging me to get involved with boys past a degree of social acceptance for a girl my age. My father had always viewed me of, kind of an experiment. After he made a few creations and discoveries of his own, he just couldn’t stop himself. If my mother were here, boy she’d kick hiss a** and tell him to stop treating me like a lab rat. I missed my mother hugely, I had not seen her since I was round about 7. She had to leave though, I don’t hold it against her that she left- but I am not entirely happy that she has never returned, never given me an address or any means of contacting her. When I am no longer tied to this dump, me and my father will, eventually, go and find her. My father and mother are still together, but in more ways they are most certainly apart. They are soul mates, and there would be no way for him to escape her, or vice versa. This was just something she had to do, mainly for their future. My father would not be able to live here much longer; it would be the end of his existence. This thought sent shivers down my spine and down every nerve ending in my body.

    My father had always called me a princess and said that one day, in our small town, my prince would come along. He had always made it clear that it was entirely essential that I would get married here. It was as if it were a prophecy. My life is like a published book; already decided and unchangeable. I think my parents have my whole life planned out, and they do not have any room for changes or opinions of my own. My theory is that my limited choice is to do with the fact that we simply are running out of time. It had always scared me that my father was so up for me flying the nest as soon as possible. Most fathers would be horrified to think of their daughter getting married and… ugh I can’t say it! Well what comes after that! But apparently my dad practically giddy at that thought. He wants it to happen- sooner rather than later. I wish I felt the same.

    I heard a knock at my door, and I knew that it would be my dad. He was the only one it could be. We lived in a house big enough for about 1000 people but the only people here were me and my dad.
    “Come in.” I said , I could feel what was coming next.
    “Afternoon angel, are you nervous about your first day at school?” he asked like he really cared how I felt- but I knew what was going on in his mind.
    “A little. I’m never going to fit in dad.” I whined, I knew it wouldn’t change anything, but it was worth a shot.
    “Come on care bear, you know we have to do this, it’s the only way.” He really thought calling me my old nickname would help, it just made me laugh.
    “Care bear?! Come on dad, I’m not like 7 anymore!” I laughed.
    “I know, you’re 16… well you know,” he joined in with my laugh, but the topic of me being 16 was only bought up for one reason. I rolled my eyes and exhaled.
    “Dad, I know why you’re here. Cut to the chase, will you.” I stated.
    “oh right, well I guess there was no point in trying to hide it from you there was no way that was going to happen.” He mumbled.
    “Point. Get to it!!” It was angering me to hear him try and get around my mind, it was impossible and he knew it. He jumped and stared at me in astonishment. You’d think I was the parent and he was the child I’d just found with his hand in the cookie jar before dinner.
    “Well, you know the reason we have to send you to school anyway, and well I know that everything will be fine because as soon as you find what we are… Looking for,” He was struggling for words, which wasn’t doing my patience any good “You’ll know straight away, and you won’t have to worry, out of all of them you’ll have your pick. You will find the right one.” He smiled. I groaned. I was doubtful, his words weren’t comforting. “Look kiddo, you can read everyone like a book, and you know it!” Which I did. I did know it. He wasn’t actually sure he knew it, he wasn’t aware of how I really did it, lots of spare time he guessed. Ha! How he was wrong! But to be fair, when you’re half human half vampire, there’s not much you can’t do.

    Luckily, actual mind-reading was a special talent of mine. One long summer day when I was about 13, I was so sensationally bored that I read a book on mind reading skills. I decided to test them just out of curiosity, but the methods were unreliable. Anyone who had any basic drama skills would probably be able to fool someone using these conventional techniques, it was all based on body language, posture, voice pitch, volume and speed and mostly facial expression. But you couldn’t really read their mind, just kind of guess their emotion. I had tested these theories on my father and they worked to an extent. That night I started to hear my father’s voice resounding random things in my head. I thought I was going crazy, I was planning to race downstairs to find what on earth was happening to me. My father being a scientist would know, right? But I stopped in the door way of my bedroom as I heard my father calling me. Or at least I thought he was calling me. “Jennifer!” It was definitely my father; but the voice in my head was now as if I could hear my father groaning to himself on all the mess I had left in his lab whilst doing a bio practical. Maybe he was actually mumbling to himself, but surely he wouldn’t be shouting yet mumbling at the same time? Was that even possible?! Surely not, what on earth is going on? Had my hearing miraculously become supersonic? I mean I am supernatural, but I didn’t remember reading that on the list of supernatural things vampires and other similar beings can do. Maybe I was just going insane, or had a telepathic moment. This continued to happen, it seemed that at every thought my father had, I could hear it as if he was saying it. So could I read minds? If I could, was it everyone? There were so many questions streaming through my mind. There was only one way to answer them. Test it. But how? I didn’t really have much interaction with many people. So one day I ran right down through the forest surrounding my land and waited-hidden-near the edge. I was high up in the trees, and I could see people walking past my ‘establishment’ and I could hear them talking, but I could hear them thinking too. It was the strangest sensation; maybe all vampires could do this? I was anxious to find out… but surely my father would have mentioned it, I didn’t want to tell him if it was something only I could do… he’s have a field day!!! So I waited until my father went out on a camping trip a few weeks later and I hacked into his laptop- due to my new acquired skill I had found out his password and that he had been in contact with my mother via email. I decided to email her urgently asking her what it was all about.

    Dear Mom,
    Please don’t tell dad that I know his password!! I am sorry for doing this and I know that you keep minimal contact for good reasons and I won’t question them. It’s just that I have to ask you something and I can’t ask dad!!! If I did he’s treat me even more like a lab rat! The thing is, recently I have been hearing peoples thoughts, kind of like I am reading their mind. I was worried that there’s something wrong with me and I wanted to know if it’s normal or whether there is something wrong with me. Please help me!!! I miss you so much and I really want to see you soon! I love you mom.

    Jennifer

    I was half expecting her not to reply. She didn’t have contact with me because it was essential. There were so many complications of what we were and we couldn’t afford any mistakes caused by distant interaction that could give us away. I was the biggest liability in my whole family. I had convinced myself that I was on my own; she wouldn’t be able to reply. Just as I had given up all hope, my father’s laptop made a noise, I jolted upright and clicked vigorously.

    Dear Jennifer,
    Don’t worry; you are secret safe with me. If I told him, you wouldn’t be the only one in trouble. Thank you for not questioning me and I will have to keep this short and as unrevealing as possible. I’m sorry I can’t explain it better to you. I agree that letting your father know about your little ‘hobby’ wouldn’t be the best idea, you know what he’s like. Well it’s not something that ‘we’ all can do, but I don’t think there’s something wrong with you. I have heard of ‘people’ that have similar talents – not the same as yours, all unique and special to that person- I believe you happen to be one of the gifted. To be honest it isn’t surprising that one of ‘your kind’ has a special talent. I miss you too angel! I will try and see you as soon as I can, but I can only promise when you are ‘ready’ and you know when that is. It’s the only way we can keep you safe; I will try and find a way to write as much as possible. I love you.

    Mom

    I think euphoric would be the best description of how I was feeling. First: I now know that I am not a complete and utter freak, second: I spoke to my mom for the first time since she left, third: my moms going to try and keep better contact! Fourth: I CAN READ PEOPLES MINDS AND I AM THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN!!! HAHA!

    I had used it to my advantage, and my father still was none the wiser. He thought it was just something I practised on Saturday nights or something. I had only tested it on a few people and I assumed that I had to be within a hearing distance of the person (but a vampires hearing distance- which is quite big) but that was just a theory, I hadn’t had a chance to trial it because my father had kept me shut away from the world. Until now at least- Now he’s practically shoving me out of the door!!!!

    * * * *

    Trying to sleep last night was useless. I plaited and un-plaited my hair about a gazillion times. I had realised about 3am that I have had a months notice and I have not made any type of attempt to act like a normal person. I have been sitting doing pretty much nothing, but I didn’t practise being more normal!!! What if I run faster than lightning when I’m late to class? What if I jump too high in gym? My parents have been so worried about me revealing the secret for years, but I had always said they were over reacting. Now I see their point. Oh dear! I can hear the villagers and their pitchforks already!!! I would have to be careful… VERY CAREFUL! I got out of bed and pulled open my curtains, I’d hoped for a sunny day so my glowing skin would be less obvious. Hoping- it just wasn’t good enough! It was pouring down with a thick curtain of rain! I then looked out my window to see my “secret gift” being drowned by the rain. Of course I guessed my secret present as soon as my dad thought about it. Audi A8, black. It was my favourite car, and I really wanted it. But the surprise element was taken away. I would never be able to have a surprise in my life. How sad. Well I might be surprised when I first hear the thought but its never going to be the conventional surprise- but then again, nothing is conventional when it comes to me. This car was beautiful and magnificent, and my father could afford many of them and thought why not. My father also restocked my wardrobe… He assumed that I would try and grunge down to blend in more at school, and he was having none of that. I remember the reasons he was thinking about when he revealed it to me, clearer than a bell: he wanted to make sure that in the unlikely case that boys wouldn’t notice me, he wanted to ensure that I had every boy’s attention. I shuddered at the reminder as I slid the door of my wardrobe across. Although I didn’t want the attention… I really wanted the clothes. But today was my first day and I didn’t want too much attention.

    If my dad knew what I had chosen as my ‘first day of school’ outfit, he would definitely gut me. I chose faded jeans and a light blue jumper, stylish but not too in your face. After that charade was over I then had an extremely human moment when my curls were flying around everywhere and anywhere. I decided that my hair would for today be best tied back in a pony tail with my newly cut in side fringe. Luckily this look made me look remotely intelligent, and I wanted people to think that I wasn’t just another bimbo. I wanted to keep a low profile, but then again… I didn’t want to be friendless either! As I could tell what people’s intentions were with me, I would be able to choose the right friends… I would know which girls only wanted me for my popularity, and which ones genuinely wanted to be my friend.

    I walked slowly downstairs, hoping that my dad wouldn’t realise my understated outfit- but I knew that he would.