I saw a commercial for Zantrax-3 this morning just as I was stuffing my face with a Krispy Kreme donut. I got extremely paranoid. Why? Because I still think of myself as overweight. Yes, this is true.
You may be wondering, "Akkie, how can a gorgeous male specimen such as yourself consider yourself fat?!"
I'll tell you. For much of my adolescent and early teen years I was pudgy. And I loved to eat. And I sucked and it was at the time of my "am I gay or what?" stage so I just ate and hated myself. So I started playing soccer and got up on stage for drama. Yeah, being fat sucked for me.
Anyway, I saw the commercial and just stuffed another donut in my mouth and switched over to Comedy Central.