I'm mad...sad...and confused. If you remember my journal entry 3/4 of a love square there was this guy I really liked.
Well on Friday I wrote him a small letter saying I had fallen for him. I asked if he wanted to go out this summer. I was nervous all weekend...
Than at break I saw him and my heart flipped. He said hey and I said hi. I was sure he would say yes...
Than today when i was seating on the cough my cell range. I looked at the number and I just knew it was him! I walked quickly to my room.
Me: Hello?
?: Hi this is .....
Me: oh hello!
?: Are you busy?
Me: Not at the minute no.
?: I wanted to talk to you about that letter
Me: okay... (I felt like flying, he was going to say yes!)
?: I...I can't go out with you
Me: (It felt like the world crashed down on me. My heart wretched horribly)
?: I'm really sorry but...
Me: It's fine...
?: I have reasons why. I don't know how much you know but I have reasons. I want to tell you but I can't because people might get mad at me.
Me: Alright...
?: I feel bad. I'm sorry
Me: It's alright! I'll talk to you later
?: okay bye
Me: bye
That was our conversation. I'm so stupid thinking he would ever want to go out with me. Of course I'm the kind of person who hides me tears...the person who is rarely sad...
But I'm not fine! I'm crying! I hate crying because it's stupid! I shouldn't be crying! But it hurts so much. I just don't understand. Is he's reason because he can't give up on K? I wish I knew...
For now I'll continue to love him from a distance...my heart aching for him more and more...but...I'll also continue to suffer...put up my shield and hide my broken heart...
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Felicitystar Community Member |
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