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Monogamy is a concept lacking in weight. If you think about it in the slightest, there are actually a lot of culturally accepted situations that would undermine the idea that monogamy is the only moral and/or realistic option. Here are just a few examples and arguments that could be used to prove that monogamy shouldn't be thought of as so... holy.
1. Imagine if you got married to the love of your life. You are together for a number of years, and live as happily as could be expected in this world. One day, the love of your life dies in a horrible accident. You are heartbroken. Your soulmate is gone; they are never coming back. Does that mean that you stop loving them? No, of course not, unless you are a somewhat odd and cold-hearted person. Now. Imagine that a few years later, after you've grieved, you meet someone new. This person is their own person, not any kind of reincarnation or replacement of your past soulmate. Over time, you bond, and you come to love each other. In fact, you come to love that person just as much as you loved your deceased soulmate; you just now have a new soulmate. Again, have you stopped loving your past lover? No. Do you currently love your new lover just as much? Yes. Already, you are an emotional polyamorist. Now, what if all three of the people mentioned were religious in such a way that they believed in some sort of heaven-like afterlife, the religion they believed in happened to be the correct one, and they were all good people. Eventually, all three would be dead, and all three would go to heaven. You would then be reunited with both of your past loves, and you would still love both of them. Unless you were so devoted to monogamy that you would abandon a soulmate for the sake of it, you would then spend your afterlife with those loved ones. Now, you are both an emotional and a spiritual polyamorist. Just as a side point, if you could have your old bodies in heaven, you would most likely become a physical polyamorist as well. To summarize, even our society condones finding a new love after one has died. If that kind of approval is given, then all the things above must be acceptable as well. It is the only thing that makes emotional, moral, and logical sense. As a last note, this could branch out into a web of polyamory, for example, if your first love had lost their first love before meeting you. Then, in the end, you would have two soulmates in heaven, one or more of whom would have one or more of their own past soulmates waiting for them.
2. This will just be conceptual, not another long-winded explanatory hypothetical situation. There are many kinds of love, obviously, and who can say which ones are most important/powerful? There is the love of friends, the love of pets, the love of your children, the love of your parents/family, and, of course, romantic love, and possibly other types as well. You can have and love more than one friend, pet, child, and parent/relative. So what makes romantic love so special? It certainly doesn't automatically outrank the other types of love. That is why being forced to choose between any number of the types is thought of as such a cruel and unfair decision. They are all love, so they should all ultimately be the same. Again, this would suggest that polyamory is emotionally acceptable.
3. Here is a simple example. Most everyone experiences minor and/or major crushes in their younger years. These crushes are generally thought of as immature forms of romantic love, but only in that they are less informed, powerful, physical (in the younger years), and regulated. They aren't thought of as a completely different kind of love. Therfore, they should be subject to the same cultural rules, right? Apparently not. Even if they are immature, it is not at all uncommon for younger people to have crushes on several people at once. A prime example would be bands. Children, teens, and even some adults are known to be so appreciative of the members of such groups that it is not at all inappropriate to say that they have crushes on them, or at the very least, the concepts of them. So right there, there is a culturally acceptable case of having romantic feelings toward several people at once. Of course, the band was just an example. The same thing happens with normal people, too, such as classmates and teachers.
***((For those who do not wish to look up the meaning of "polyamory", it is merely where a person (or persons) has romantic feelings (which may or may not include sexual feelings, but those are irrelevant) for more than one person. The more commonly known term is "polygamy", but that word refers specifically to being married to more than one person, and marriage does not technically require love, since it is a legal status in our culture.))***
There are probably other arguments as well, but none come to mind at the moment, and a lot has already been said, so this should be enough for now.
 magic_doglover · Fri Jul 23, 2010 @ 11:58pm · 0 Comments |
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