I Spend a quater of my day listening to people b***h, whine and moan about their own lives. I listen and give feed back and try to help them out. Thats what I do, I listen and help. I never once complain about them always griping to me about their life, their boyfriend/girlfriend, nor to I tell them that I jsut don't want to listen.
But here is the kicker, when I want to talk about myself and how I feel no one wants to listen or hear me out. I always get the, wow you complain to much, or the ' well don't get me started... blah blah' Its like, Okay I know you've had a bad time now too, but can you just hear me out? I know my troubles aren't half as bad as your b ut I still feel distressed never the less! But no, my problems aren't half as important as everyone else nor was I that important to begin with!
Does anyone care that I'm stressed over school? I can't deside what to take right now or if I even want to continue school since i'm not intelligent enough to figure out what the ******** I want to do with my life?
Or that I'm having trouble with people at work? getting harassed by people at there, disrespected and belittle don a daily basis? That I feel like I've failed as a supervisor becuase everyone wont stop telling me what I did wrong or that I'm stupid for not knowing how to do this and this when I got only 1 day of training then given keys to do it solo one night later? Or I get s**t for correcting someone and called a jerk for doing so when its doen to me every shift?
That I'm having sleeping problems, that my joints in my arms strangly hurt allt he tiem now right down to my fingers? That I'm not happy with the way I look.. that I'm fed up of just being everyones friend and I just want someone to love me beside my ******** parents! I want someone to say ' wow you look great today' without feeling guilted to say so. Or that I have the urdge to suddenly burst out crying at random points in the day just becuase I can't take this s**t anymore!
NO!
No one ******** cares!! No one will listen! No one gives a flying ******** that I cant take this stupid life anymore! That some days it jsut doesnt seem worth gettign up in the morning and hiding in my bed seems like a nicer option.
All of this builds inside and yet I keep this annoyingly happy look on my face and still listen to everyone else b***h as my head and heart get fuller and fuller until I want to ******** burst!! Oh but if I did that then I'd be told I was complaining to much..or that I was being unreasnable.... ...
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................ ******** I'm pathetic...
