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HI! listen ive never put pablo out in pulic so u guys r lucky to read this. "zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz" "CEEZER WAKE UP YO"! "huh? "oh hecktor itz you what"? "weres pablo dude"? asked ceezer. "he went to hall mart". hecktor answered. the door opened wide pablo walked in an ploped on the couch. "hay pablo pacaso where were you getting"? asked ceezer. "The worst day of my life" said pablo. pablo has a crush on a girl named eina he asked her out to day an uh it didnt go to well. "i asked out eina an she walked away in fear" pablo said. "uh to bad um im staveing lets eat" said ceezer. "yeah man go make food or call over rina shes good at cooking" said hecktor. Ok i will pablo said. Rina's phone rang she answered. "Hello"? "Uh rina can you come over an make us some breckfast please"? pablo asked. "ok im board any way so ok" rina replied. When sshe walked in the door ceezer said hi to her wile pablo an hecktor were in the bed room they didnt know she was there yet. "uh can i ask you some thing rina"? said ceezer. "ok" rina said. They walked in to the other room with him. Uh rina will you uh go out with me"? asked ceezer. You see cceezer has had a crush on her sence at least 3rd grade. "um uh um uh uhhhhhhhhh o-ok sure" said rina. "yes"! ceezer said. Rina then grabed him an kissed him deeply in love. Hee hee i like wrighting funny stuff but i like romance to so i put that in my story hee plz coment!
bye bye see you next time ok?
- by iCandyRainbowz |
- Fiction
- | Submitted on 10/23/2008 |
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- Title: pablo
- Artist: iCandyRainbowz
- Description: pablo is in love awwwwwwww
- Date: 10/23/2008
- Tags: pablo
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Comments (2 Comments)
- Neko_Bri - 01/12/2009
- Eh heh, while I agree with most of what you've said, you really should practice what you preach. For example; you cited improper spelling and capitalization, while not capitalizing "I" and misspelling "horrible" and "sentence".
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- Nerai Kentouken - 10/23/2008
- bland, improper spelling, horrable punctuation, nasty sentance structure, discusting dialouge, disturbing capatalization...i can go on. you really need to take another look at it, correct your mistakes, separate it into paragraphs, add correct spelling and punctuation and then i might be able to read it without getting an anyerism. no offence.
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