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It was just a boring mundane city, conforming with the rest of the world. Every morning, the lower income residents travel their short commutes in their average cars or on the subway to their average factory job, just to come back to their average American families. The factory spouts out billions of ominous smoke into the early morning sky. Meanwhile, down below on street level, two people meet in a diner for the first time…
It’s just after dawn when a man, taking a train up to New York City, ends up at this city by pure chance, at a rundown diner. He spies a woman across the room arguing with a dangerous looking man about something.
His name is Mike, and he’s having a hard time with things lately, and just hopes to make a fresh start somewhere new. His shoulder-length black hair is graying, and he just seems jaded with the world. Little does he know that this one woman could change his point of view on the world.
He catches her eye as the waiter brings him his soda, a seemingly desperate look on her face. The guy with her notices that one glimpse of eye contact, and more of the conversation ensues, with her saying a few more things. After a few moments of glaring at her, the man gets up and storms out leaving the woman looking dejected and forlorn.
Her name is Selen, and she’s just given up on finding someone that wants to love her, just for herself. She’s jaded, and she’s not even twenty-five yet. Her long brown hair is tied up in a knot on the back of her head, with a few strands hanging down into her face. She makes no move to move them as she nurses her coke.
- by SeleenRaven |
- Fiction
- | Submitted on 06/18/2009 |
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Comments (4 Comments)
- LeanderMalfoy - 07/15/2009
- I thought it was good, and I'm glad you continued it. It has great potential. 5/5 I know the work you put into this and what inspired it. The story deserves it.
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- energygal456 - 06/20/2009
- It was pretty good. I liked the descriptions of the different people. 4/5 smile
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- xXxFreeToListenxXx - 06/19/2009
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ok first off to the person below me i understood ALL of the vocab she used, ur not the only person on gaia who understands words like that so stop acting like u know it all stare
second it was a good start but it could use sum work, like on character and setting descriptions but you'll get there. 4/5 - Report As Spam
- enmortem - 06/19/2009
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Hhm...it was just okay. Nothing really special about. Nothing that grabbed me and pulled me in. The descriptions could be better and the vocabulary? It was great for me but half of the people on this website probably won't understand it at all. I'll give this a 4/5 because it just wasn't amazing for me but it wasn't terrible either. No hard feelings I hope.
Feel free to comment and rate my stories. - Report As Spam