• I watched as he was being lowered into the ground. But, I wasn't crying. I couldn't cry. Even if I was crying, I wouldn't be able to feel it. I felt numb. "Alice, it is OK..." I heard his voice. I gasped and looked around, not seeing anyone but his family and our friends, crying. I felt like he was there, but shook this feeling away. He is dead idiot....Never coming back... I thought to myself.

    I sighed and looked up at the sky. It was cloudy and dark. Of course, just like in books and stories; on funerals or any other sad day, it would be dark and rainy. I rolled my eyes and past the grave. There was someone walking towards me. "A-Alic-e!" I heard his mother say. I walked over to her not feeling my legs. "Yes, Helen?" I asked quietly, barely able to hear myslef. "Alice, my dear. I am so-sorry. I know that you are hurting..." I just nodded; I couldn't find my voice.

    "I am sorry Mom. Please, would you ever forgive me?" I heard his voice again. My eyes widened, but I still tried to ignore the voice while trying to not cry and trying hard to ignore the pain in my chest. After she was done talking, James, her husband and his father, collected her. I waved to them and sighed.

    I looked over my shoulder and saw my friends. There was Elizabeth, his sister and my best friend, clutching onto Josh, her boyfriend and his best friend. Behind them, there was Kayla, my other best friend, holding onto her boyfriend, Adam, his other best friend...

    I don't have anyone to cry to...Oh yeah, because he is the one we are crying over... I thought bitterly...

    I shook the bitterness away and looked at his grave. It said:

    Here lies Nicholas Joshua Floren
    1982-2009
    Loving son, You shall forever
    Be Missed

    They forgot to mention lover... But, I guess they only cared about family. I sighed, closing my eyes and thinking about how I didn't have any family.

    My parents had died in a fire when my little sister, brother, and I were little. We were taken in to an orphange and raised. One time, while at bank, there was a robbery and a lot of shooting. A gun shot my brother in the chest when he tried to move out of the way. He didn't make it.

    A year later, my little sister (who was 16 by the time) died after she was raped. I was so lost. Then, I found Nicholas. And, he helped me. 5 years later (present time), Nicholas died in a car accident. Now, I had no body again and no one would be able to help me...

    Sure, I had my friends...But, it just didn't feel the same knowing that nothing like this had ever happened to them...

    I opened my eyes. It was blurry. I blinked and a single tear fell down my cheek. "Alice....Don't cry..." I heard him again. Wind blew on my face and my tear was whipped away. I gasped.

    I looked behind me and saw my friends looking at me sadly. I waved to them, telling them to go on home and not wait for me. They hesitated at first, but finally left. I was alone.

    I looked up and saw the sun peeking out from the clouds and I could tell that it was setting. I smiled at I remembered the last time the sun was setting and Nicholas was here watching it with me:

    "Nicholas!" I giggled as he pulled my hand. We were in a meadow. We would always go here every night to look up at the stars, but, the sun was still out and Nicholas was pulling us into a different direction than when we usually went. "Where are we going?" He just ignored me and kept pulling us.

    Finally, we made it up a hill and we could see a little lake on the bottom. I looked at him a little confused. "What?" But, he was grinning ear to ear and looking in front of him, expecting me to do the same. I tilted my head towards the side and looked in front of me, my eyes widening. I gasped; it was beautiful! It was the most beautful sun set I had every seen; the sun set the sky ablaze with a combination of fiery red and passionate orange. The sun was reflected on the small, cool lake below us.

    "Nicholas, it is beautiful!" I exclaimed, hugging him tightly. He whipped at something under my eye and I realized that I was crying. He smiled and hugged me back, pulling my closer to him. We sat down and watched as the sun set. I watched as the full moon lit up the night sky. Sparkling stars filled the smooth velvet sky.

    "Alice?" Nicholas whispered. "Yes?" I whispered back. "I love you." He said, looking me in the eyes. I looked back at his caramell brown eyes and smiled. "I love you too, Nicholas." I whispered. "Do you really mean that?" He asked, his eyes widening and his smile getting bigger. I smiled and nodded. "With every fiber of my being..." I said, my voice trailing off as I looked into his hypnotizing eyes. I hugged him and tightly and kissed his nose. He leaned forward and captured my lips with his. This was the best day I had ever had and I hoped that it would never end...

    I sniffed at the memory and more tears fell. "Alice..." I heard him again. This time however, I heard him from behind me and it felt as though he was whispering it into my ear. I turned around and saw him. I gasped. "Alice...It is OK. You can see me..." He murmured into my ear. I just stared at him, my eyes wide. I wanted to reach out and touch him, kiss him, hug him. But, I knew that I couldn't. I smiled and looked up at him, allowing more tears to fall. "This isn't happening," He looked at him confused. "You are not really here. You are in heaven. I am not talking to you. I can't. There is no possible way." "Oh," He said, catching on. "Well, explain why I am here then." He said expectantly.

    "Easy; I have a very wide imagination." I said simply. He sighed. "Well, I guess that I can't convince you. But, I am still here either way. And, I want you to know that I still love you and that I hate to see you cry." He said, putting his hand on my cheek. I gasped; I could actually feel it! It felt warm and soft like the real Nicholas's hand. But, I had convinced myself that it was just my imagination talking and that I wished that it was real.

    "Now, Alice. You should go home. It is getting colder out here and I don't want you to get sick." He said, a little sternly. I turned away from him and faced his grave. "I...I can't leave you...I mean...I can't leave him..." I said, more tears falling down without my control. "Honey, you aren't leaving me. I am always going to be with you. Now, go home." He said. I looked at him and saw that he had the same warm, hypnotizing, caramell brown eyes.

    I nodded without thinking. "Good," He said smiling. He then was gone and I felt the little pain in my chest leave with him. He was the same as Nicholas; same hypnotizing eyes, same warm hands, same sweet caring self. No! I thought to myself, It is just my imagination! It isn't possible! I would not fall for my mind's tricks.

    And with that, I walked home trying to ignore everything that reminded me of Nicholas. Which, by the way, was really hard considering we went almost everywhere together...
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    In a matter of fifteen minutes, I had arrived home. I took out my keys and unlocked the door. I turned on the light and walked in, stopping when I saw that everything there reminded me of Nicholas. There were pictures everywhere, the dinner table where we would be every meal, our loveseat, everything!

    I felt tears spring to my eyes, making my vision blurry. I wiped them away with the back of my hand and shut the door. I walked over and collapsed on the couch. A just sat and looked around and through all the pictures of Nicholas and I. My eyes started to droop so I decided that it was time to go to bed. I walked upstairs and landed on my bed, falling asleep.
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    It had been about 3 months since his death and it hadn't gotten any better. I was seen talking to him a lot more now. I have been having a few suicide thoughts, but I would never commit them. Ever. I could tell that my friends were starting to worry. A lot. I kept reasurring them that nothing would happen, but they weren't convinced. Also, Elizabeth and Kayla were always trying to fix me up with someone...But, I don't think I am ready.

    Now, I am sitting down on my couch and watching some Nickeloden TV show. All of a sudden, my door bell rang. I sighed and walked over to open it.

    "He-" I was cut off by my friends running in. I gasped and looked at them. "What do you guys want?" I said, a little harshly. They just ignored me and grabbed my arms. "Alice, you don't have to pretend. We know that you are sad." Kayla said. I just stared at her, shaking my head. Elizabeth rolled her eyes and said, "Oh Alice, yes you are! Kayla is right!" "Now, what can we do to make you fe-" Kayla was cut off by my door ringing again.

    I sighed and answered it. But, it wasn't who I expected it to be. No, it wasn't Adam or Josh, but a new face. He had short, messy, jet black hair; soft, ocean blue eyes; and he was wearing black jeans, with a blue, long, sweatshirt. "Hi," He said, his voice deep and husky. "My name is Matt. I am your new neighbor and I wanted to introduce myself." My eyes were wide and my mouth was open. "My name is Alice. C-Come on in," I said, stepping out of the way and letting him in.

    When I turned around, I saw both Elizabeth and Kayla smirking. I looked at them a little confused. "Oh, nothing..." They said together playfully. I rolled my eyes and shooed them away. They went upstairs and Matt and I sat on my couch.

    We got to chatting and I realized that him and I were alike. He liked almost everything that I liked, he mainly listens to music, writes, and stays indoors than going out much, like me. I realized that I could get to like him...
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    It has been about 2 months since I have met Matt. Him and I have gotten pretty close. Tonight, he wanted to show me something.

    A few minutes later, Matt picked me up and drove us to a meadow. I have been here before! I thought. It was the same meadow that Nicholas and I went to. I felt like crying, but, I held it in.

    He parked and grabbed my hand, pulling me out of the car, and pulled us to a hill. I had remembered this hill. I smiled.

    When we made it up the hill, I looked out and saw that the moon lit up the sky just like before. The stars were shining and reflecting off of the lake. Matt pulled me close and hugged me tightly. I looked up to him a little confused. "Alice...I...I...I really like you, maybe even love." He said. I gasped and looked into his eyes, only seeing hope and truth. I smiled. "I...I like you too. A lot..." He looked into my eyes and smiled back.

    He leaned in and captured my lips with his. It felt great, but I kind of felt like I was cheating on Nicholas. I looked over Matt's shoulder and onto the lake. There, standing on top of the water was Nicholas. My eyes widened and I almost pulled away from Matt. But, Nicholas just shook his head smiling and said in a whisper, "Alice, go on. You love him and he loves you. You belong together. I will always be here for you." I nodded slightly.

    "I love you..." He said, and he was gone. I nodded slightly. I looked back at Matt and closed my eyes, leaning into the kiss.

    I now have Matt, Kayla, Adam, and their new little baby girl, Alexandra, Josh, Elizabeth, and their two little boys, Edmund and Jacob.

    I feel happy now, complete. And, now, I have someone new to spend my life with. This is the best feeling ever and I hope it will never end...