• There I was, standing on the curb, waiting for my expected guest.

    It was a beautiful morning on the Puget Sound. I could hear the waves crash against the shore on the other side of the road as I waited. Many other homes sat quietly in the still of morning. I turned back see my next door neighbor, Joe, sitting by his window peering across the sound at Bremerton. He caught my eye and waved. I waved back. I was so full of excitement, I only had about two hours of sleep because I was too jittery. Unfortunately, I was too dumb to bring my cup of coffee with me, so I just froze in the chilly October air and tried to fight the insanity that bubbled, a resolute of my lack of sleep.

    Driving down quiet Beach Drive, my friend was arriving. I watched the small black car as it parked beside me. The puddles of water from last nights rain splashed as the tires ran through them. The pilot quickly opened her door and stepped out. Her short red hair swayed in the breeze, her beautiful gray eyes shined brightly, and her soft pink lips pulled into a smile as she turned to face me. It was as if the most dazzling and priceless sculpture was sat in front of me. I started to become dizzy, or maybe it was the insanity unveiling, who knows?

    She shut the door quietly and walked up to me, threw her delicate arms around my neck, and stood on her tippy-toes to kiss me. It was a short kiss, too short, for our long separation. Something was up.

    “Its been awhile Max,” she said as she pulled away, dropping her arms to he sides. All traces of happiness now gone. I nodded in agreement.

    “Well see,” she continued, “I don't think it is going to work out anymore. While I was in college, I met a guy named Jeff. He is very nice, and we have a lot in common... But some how, I fell in love with him. So I'm going with him now. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Max.”

    I couldn't move, I couldn't speak. I just watched, as my ex-girlfriend, Ronda Stewart, stepped back into her shiny black car and launched it in to the distance. I stared after her with sorrowful eyes, until her car disappeared into the distant, low fog. How could she do this to me? I haven't seen her for three months, and at the reunion she breaks up with me! I wish I could have the money to go to a big university, none of this would have ever happened.

    It hurt to insert the memory. My girlfriend for two years, the love of my life, has just dumped me. The dazzling and priceless sculpture was stolen from me and I would never get it back. I quickly peeked at the jewelry box hidden in my pant pocket, which held the beautiful diamond ring. A sigh filled my lungs, full of regret and despair, along with tears as well. I caught Joe's eye again, he also seemed very sad, for me at least.

    I sulked back up the driveway and went inside my house. Once I shut the door, a wave of emotion hit me and I fell helplessly against the wall crying.

    Many memories filled me as I sat. I remember when we first met, I had just came from math class and met up with my friends for lunch. Ronda was actually talking with them. I could clearly remember how she looked, she had beautiful glowing skin and long sleeve red shirt with a gray tank top speaking out the top. Her slim legs were shown off in her skinny jeans, and she wore red Chuck Taylor Converse. We talked for a while, and we seemed to just click. We even ate lunch together, and began to talk everyday. Not too soon after that I asked her out, and we've together ever since. Or I mean, until five minutes ago.

    -

    When I woke up, the first thing I noticed was how much my shoulder hurt. I got up and also realized that sometime during my crying I had cried myself to sleep. I leaned against the corner between the wall and door to stretch out sore arm. After that I got up and stalked over to the kitchen. It felt like a cloud of my anguish was floating over my head, impairing my ability to be happy. Plus, that empty spot where happiness was, had filled with hunger.

    The first thing to greet me was the bright 2:30 PM shining on the microwave. Wow, I had slept for five hours. Well I didn't get very much sleep last night. That might explain it. But why was it so dark? I pulled up the binds of a nearby window and noticed the bullets of rain shooting violently down the window in what seemed like sheets of water. It was so dark for the storm clouds that I could barely see the trees that were 100 feet away.

    Great. All I need was my life to be like a sappy love story. Ronda, oh
    Ronda. I felt tears fill my eyes just thinking about her. But I shook the memory away and turned on the lights. The whole room burst into light and the small kitchen could now be seen with better clarity. I reached into the cabinet and grabbed my three ingredients for a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. But making PB&J wasn't a hard enough task to distract myself. My eyes filled back up again. This was just pathetic.

    After I finished making my sandwich I cleaned up and sat down to eat. If I was in my right state if mind I might have noticed that my sandwich was a little soggy from my tears. Yet, I was too distracted to notice much. I just stared off into space and absentmindedly chewed my gross lunch.

    But what was I supposed to do? I had to move on with my life. Yet half of me wanted to run after her. She stole a part of me when she left, and I wanted it back. Even more, her. But I had to get real, I don't even know where she is. She doesn't want me. What I had to do was build a new piece to replace my missing one. And that was going to be just as hard as living my life without her.

    When I finished my sandwich I decided to do some simple stuff like open up the rest of the blinds to bring in the little light that could be seen through the dark stormy clouds. But the angry clouds didn't help with my mood as well as the bright sun probably would.

    I eventually decided to sit back down and think through everything that had happened early today. Well, for starters, my girlfriend dumped me. Whoever didn't understand that must have a mental malfunction or something.

    Secondly, yet still on the obvious side of the story, I was not in at all happy about it. My heart ached, my whole life seemed pointless, she was my life for Pete's sake. Wherever Pete is, or why it was for his sake, I still haven't figured out.

    Third, I needed to find something to do to get my mind off things... a new hobby perhaps? Everything else was too confusing and I wasn't yet able to put into words. I just sulked in my chair, sad that I now had nothing to distract myself. I could feel my emotions and painful thoughts creeping back up.

    Suddenly, I heard someone knock on the door. “It's open,” I greeted the unknown person absently. Then the door swung open and my buddy Dave stepped inside. He studied my face as he walked into the kitchen and sat beside me. “You look like s**t,” he announced once he was seated at my small table.

    “Well I sure as hell feel like it,” I looked up at him. “Ronda dumped me.”

    Now the first thing you need to get about Dave is that he doesn't know a lot about love. He gets a new girlfriend every two weeks it seems like. I've known the guy since junior high, and I can tell you right now that he's never had a serious relationship at all. So this topic isn't his best, but I had to talk to somebody.

    “I'm really sorry, dude. I know how much you like her. But going to the party solo is okay, too. You got me! Don't worry about her,” he punched my arm playfully.

    “Oh, I forgot all about it.” We were going to our friend Kordell's house to hang out with his college buddy's at U.W.

    “Plus I heard he invited a few sororities over, so you can maybe get a new girl. Look on the bright side, you are now free.”

    “Maybe, but right now freedom doesn't feel so great... Don't you have a girl your taking?”

    “Yeah, Cathy. I'm picking her up on the way to Kordell's house.”

    “This isn't going to end well. You probably will be checking out the other girls and piss her off.”

    I remember a time in 9th grade when he just got a new girlfriend in the previous class and they were walking to class together. But the one girl Dave really liked walked by and he started talking to her and I guess he must have looked at her funny or said something bad because when I saw him in class he had a red hand print on his face and is new ex-girlfriend pushed past him angrily and gave him an evil glare. Even to this day I don't know what he did, but couldn't help but laugh at how bad he was with women.

    Dave laughed without humor, “Not anymore, I decided to grow up and put that childish stuff aside.”

    I rolled my eyes, “That'll be a day.”

    He stood up from the table aggressively, “You wanna go, McKinney?” He was acting really tough. His hands were balled into fists, and his body was in a fighting position. But his playful smile wasn't hiding very well.

    I grinned back at him and stood up to take the same pose he was in, “Maybe I do.” We didn't hold our stances for very long until we busted out in laughter. No matter how much he sucks at relationships with women, he was the best friend I could ask for. We sat back down and I attempted to take my last bite of my sandwich, now that I was paying attention to the taste and texture I finally realized how gross it really was. I swallowed it uneasily as Dave started to mess with his curly brown hair.

    He actually was a pretty good looking kid, which is probably why he got so many girls. He had the light skin with freckles and his curly hair. But yet he still looked like a nerd (which I picked on him about), but his contacts helped him fix that look.

    “So you ready to go?” he asked casually.

    “It's only like 3:00.”

    “I know, but Kordell won't mind. Besides, I'm getting tired of 'retro-land'.”

    I'll admit, my whole kitchen was very retro. I'm just a person who likes weird things.

    I laughed, “Whatever. Fine, let's go.”

    After we picked up Dave's girlfriend, Cathy, and got to Kordell's house it was already packed. I peek at the glowing clock on the dashboard and noticed it was 9:30. “How the heck did we get her so late?”

    “Well did hang out at Cathy's house for awhile,” Dave answered.

    “And there was some traffic getting here,” Cathy added, absentmindedly smiling at Dave.

    “Right,” I sighed. It seems that my depression might be making me a bit out of it today. I shook it off and decided to scan the house. As I examined more, I could see lots of people through the windows. There was even some people walking outside in the lawn. Kordell's house was a big three story house, too. So this was bound to be insane. “Well let's go.”

    We all stepped out of Dave's old car and followed the cement pathway up to the front door. The closer you got to the house, the clearer the bass could be heard. The house seemed to be shaking to the beat of the irrationally loud music. But when you stepped inside the music was clear and you could finally make out the words in the song.

    Right when we got in Kordell ran up to greet us. He was a tall, muscular man with dark skin and shaved head. He always wore ridiculously tight dress shirts that make you wonder how he got it on. He quickly scanned our small group and said, “Where's Ronda?”

    I looked at the floor so he couldn't see my true sorrow, “She dumped me.”

    “No way, bro. I'm so sorry. Well I hope that the party cheers you up. Plus there is lots of girls to choose from.” As sensitive as a rock.

    “Uh maybe,” I said as a looked up and browsed the people in the room. All the girls were wearing tight shirts, and short shorts or skirts. Some even took it a step further to wear a short dress, including Cathy. This may sound odd for a guy, but I wasn't impressed. It's October for crying out loud! Maybe going out to a party wasn't what I needed after all.

    “Well I'm going to go over there,” Kordell stated and jabbed his thumb to his left, “so you guys do what you want, there's Guitar Hero downstairs, and some food and drink in the kitchen.”

    “Well actually I'm pretty thirsty you wanna get something to drink?” Cathy asked Dave.

    “Sure, you wanna come Max?”

    “Yeah, sure,” was all I said as I walked beside the couple to the kitchen ahead. But right before we got to the kitchen a boy and girl got into a screaming match that had everyone silently observing.

    “Oh my God Cal, your such a a*****e! What made you decide to go making out with some random slut? You know what I don't care you can have her, I'll just get another boyfriend!”

    From the looks of Cal it seemed as though he'd already had one too many drinks, and the girl sitting in his lap didn't seem to care. She looked extremely thrilled to have started some drama. “Sure, you do that! Like I care Brittany!” was all Cal said before he continued kissing the girl sitting on him.

    A chorus of “Ooh!”s filled the hallway.

    Poor Brittany huffed angrily and turned around. As she did she spotted Dave and stepped toward him and gave him a huge kiss. Dave seemed to forget the whole world or something cause he kissed her back and that was all he seemed to care about until Cathy's hand flew up and slapped him and Brittany right across the face. Cathy's face was just as red as the hand print on Dave's face and it only remained that way for a moment before she dashed off to the restroom.

    All the bystanders roared in laughter, I was just about to join in until a brunette girl stepped in front of me. She seemed nice enough, she had a happy smile and pretty blue eyes. But the drunken look swimming in them gave away her intentions. “Hi,” she said, “you must be new to U.W. I'm Hannah.”

    “I actually don't go to college right now, I'm just her because I'm friends with Kordell.” I tried to back away slowly to a nearby staircase, but Hannah just followed me.

    “Oh that's nice.”

    Out of nowhere some random blond girl walked up to me and put her hand on my shoulder. “I've seen you've met my friend Hannah. Quite the slut, isn't she?”

    I was just about to push her away but Hannah did it for me. “Hey, I saw him first!”

    By this time I was right in front of the stairs. I bolted up them without looking back. But from what I could hear the two girls didn't notice my absence.

    Once I was at the top, I was in an empty hallway. I could still hear the loud music from downstairs, but it was much quieter. A peaceful place. But the recent events were still heavy in my head. Where college people really that dumb? Geez, I'm almost glad I didn't go to U.W. Yet it could just be the excessive use of alcohol on the group of people, I wouldn't know for sure.

    My thoughts drifted away as I noticed glass door opening to balcony, which also seemed just as uninhabited as the hallway. I sighed and began walking toward the balcony to get some fresh air.

    I instantly felt irritated. At Ronda, at Dave, at Kordell, and everyone else who might have affected something .It was mostly just my pointless anger that has been swelling up since Ronda left. I tried to fight it. I tried to contain it. But one of the bad things about being irritated is that you don't have as big of a need to let it go as you probably should.

    When I reached the glass I opened it vigorously and and slammed it shut, growling as I did it.

    “Hi, are you okay?” a woman's voice asked. She sounded very close, and her voice sounded like honey, it felt as if the honey ran through my veins and eased my anger. The constant aching in my chest that I'd been baring all day seemed to simmer down a bit.

    Instantaneously I turned to look at her, I expected her to be startled or annoyed. But instead she was very calm.

    The woman was short with long blond hair that was curled so it fanned around her face. Her big eyes were a mixture of gray, green, and blue, which shown brightly on her pale skin.

    “Oh uh, I'm really sorry. I didn't know you were up here,” my words came out in a rush. “By the way, hi, I'm Max,” I extended my hand out to her.

    She smiled and shook my hand. “Nice to meet you, Max. I'm Claire.”

    “Nice name,” I smiled back. She definitely looked like a Claire.

    “Thanks... So why exactly did you come up here?”

    “Oh it's a long story...” I trailed off. But she looked as if she wanted to know. “Well my girlfriend broke up with me today and I'm not quite myself.”

    “Ah. Well what was her name?”

    “Ronda.” I stared at the ground two stories below me. A tear began to form and trail down my face. I don't think I've ever expressed how sad I was to anyone until now.

    “She must have been really important to you.”

    “Yeah. I loved her more than anything. But I guess relationships don't always hold up when the people are separated,” at this point my voice was starting to quiver. But it felt good to talk to someone about it.

    “I know what you mean,” she sighed. “That happened to me in high school. My boyfriend moved away to California. That Christmas he came back with news of a new girlfriend. You should be gratefu,l your not half the wreck I was when I found out.”

    I chuckled. “I'm sorry, and I'm sorry I'm the wreck I am. I'm normally not this emotional.”

    Claire gave a little laugh, “It's okay.” Her laugh was the kind that was contagious and made you laugh yourself. Which was exactly what I did.

    But my mind was too full of emotion and my little giggle unveiled another tear.

    “Okay, now you listen to me,” Claire said as she grabbed my head, turned it so it faced her, and wiped my tears away. But she caught her breathe and stared into my eyes as if she was hypnotized.

    At that moment it felt as if I could know all her secrets just by staring into her eyes. And the deeper I looked, the closer I would be to the vault that held them. We stared at each other another moment until she remembered what she was doing.

    “Oh uh, you can't let a girl tear you apart, she is just another girl. There are a lot of others in the world. Just look around and you may find something even better than your Ronda.”

    “Oh s**t!” the male's voice cry interrupted us from downstairs.

    Everything stopped abruptly to hear what he had to say. The murmur of voices downstairs, the music, even Claire and I paused to the distant cry.

    “Kordell's parents are going to be here any minute!” he finally announced.

    “Right,” I sighed. “I forgot, Kordell told me his parents were on vacation and they didn't know about the party.” Her hand was still holding my chin, she then let go.

    “I guess they got back early,” Claire noted. “We better go.”

    Claire and I walked off the balcony and descended down to the second story. It was a mad house. People ran in every direction in panic. Some hurrying out the door, others trying to collect the group they carpooled in, a few were nice enough to quick clean up their mess before fleeing themselves. One girl ran up to Claire.

    “We have to go.” She grabbed Claire's wrist.

    Claire gave me a look that can only be described as sorrow. “Well maybe I'll see you around, Max.”

    “Yeah,” I smiled as hope sparked through me.

    The girl still holding Claire's wrist now pulled her into the crowd of panicking people.

    I met up with Dave to see what the plan was. Cathy had gotten a different ride home so we decided that we'd stay and help Kordell clean up the best we could.

    Once the last group left, us amigos where left alone in a disaster of a house.

    “The term screwed comes to mind,” I noted.

    Kordell and Dave let out a little chuckle.

    ---------

    If anyone reads this let me know what you think. If it's liked I'll add another chapter.