Snowy Woods

• Artist: Devilish Lil Flower13
• Description: My Language arts teacher gave me a 85% on this so my grade for this nine weeks is a C. Why didnt she give me a 100%? That might of bumed it up to a low B maybe. Tell me what you think of my descriptive writing report.
• Date: 01/05/2009
• Tags: snow woods descriptive cold sadness

The calm forest stood still in icy elegance, painted in colors of white and

black. Frost covored Christmas pines stood pround and high above the

ground as frail snow flakes slowly danced down to the frozen blanket of

snow below the branches. Faintly, a dry crisp wind whispered through the

lanky trees, playfully tossing up some snow, and swerved in and out of the

trees then the crystals were blown further into the forest. The branches

swayed as if waving goodbye to the snow that once covered its limbs. Farther

and farther away the wind carried the frost untill it reached a misty river, and

the pattered flakes that settled into the chilled water then floated out of the

glitering forest.

-x-

OMG how did I get a 85%!! crying

Comments

[Guilty Bystander]

Though I think you are onto a great poem, the spelling and grammar issues may have been what lowered your grade. Go through it again, if you want of course, and try to use some fresh, new ways of describing what you see-- this will bring the full flavor out of your piece, whereas the use of cliches makes it a little bland.