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Laying on his couch in his aged and danky living room, the end credits of the movie still scrolled up the television set. Cinnamon, his boxer, was curled up on the opposite end of the couch, it's eyes seemed to read, "love me", and the animal stared in jealousy as we embraced each other. The curves of our body fit perfectly together, like puzzle pieces. Alone, we were abstract, but put together, made the whole picture.
It was silent, besides our breathing, and the occasional whimper from the dog, who was now inching closer every minute. My head rested on his chest, and I could hear his heart beating behind his ribcage, faster every second. I could feel his blistering hand on the bare skin of my lower back, and he pulled me close to his body with his arms, his chin resting on the top of my head. I placed my hand on his abdomen, right on the well toned muscles, they pulsed as blood ran through them. Our legs entwined in each other, and we lay like this. No stress, no tension, just serenity.
I couldn't see his face, obviously, but I could tell that his eyes were closed, just like mine. We both shared the desire to stay suspended in time. In the arms of this almost complete stranger, I felt safer and more loved then I had in my entire life. I just knew that no one could care about me more then he could. He cared about me probably more then he cared about himself, or at least I like to think. Just the way he held me made me feel alive, even though I knew I was empty.
I decided to shift my head, so I could stealthily peek out behind closed lids to examine his face. As I did, his expression surprised me. It was so, so content! He looked like he had seen a newborn sibling for the first time. He was beautiful. So beautiful, and I suddenly realized that it was because of me. It was because I was here, laying in his arms. It was because of me that he looked so beautiful. I quickly shut my eyes and smiled, even more.
Suddenly, I felt his arm pull me tighter to his body, and then it relaxed. I now knew what I wanted to do. Slowly, I inched my head up, until I could feel his hot breath on my chapstick-covered lips. He responded by pulling me even closer to him, until I could feel our lips touching, but only slightly. It wasn't a kiss- yet.
We froze, as if someone had hit the pause button on a VCR, and we were the movie. We just lay there, embraced in each others' arms, breathing silently. Then, nervousness lay siege on my body. I could feel it creeping, seeping into me, though I didn't let it phase me, I knew what I had to do, what I wanted to do.
I don't know who finally did it, but it happened;
Our lips came together in a graceful kiss. It felt so right, to me at least. It was the first time I had kissed someone where it didn't trigger Luna, my sexually aggressive alter ego or Sally, my shy, depressed and meek one. I was one person, yet I was three; Luna, Sally and me. But this time, it was all me. No alters, nothing. I, myself, was completely in this kiss, and it was perfect.
I barely noticed it when he pulled me on top of him, the kiss never breaking, no. It become more intense, it spiraled in. Our tongues caressed and entangled, like a couple making love to one another for the first time after they are married. My hands rested on either side of his shoulders, and I dug my nails into the cheap cotton threading or his sofa as he bit my lip. His hands ran up and down my arched back, and his nails occasionally dug into my skin, leaving angry red lines along my spine.
We continued like this, biting each other, scratching, choking. It was amazing, we never wanted to stop. But we had to.
The sound of the slamming car door and keys in the lock of the front door of his house made us separate. His parents were home, and it was time for me to go, with memories, yes, I remembered this perfect kiss with this perfect man. No lost sections of time, no alters came out. It was finally all just me. All me, and all him;
Two people in aspiration.
- by Clever Lemonade |
- Non Fiction
- | Submitted on 03/01/2009 |
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