• You said you loved me, but it was a lie. You said you'd be there for me, but that's not true. How can you ever help me, when you need to help yourself? I was so reluctant, so cautious. I didn't think it'd work. I was skeptical. Even so, I found myself drawn to you. Why?

    I told myself I wouldn't become too attached. I told myself it wasn't real. I denied all truth. I said it wasn't possible--that a person could begin to understand me, when I can't understand myself. Even with all this, I fell for it. I fell for the trick that the heart plays, and has played since time immemorial. I thought, This person can help. This person can know me in ways I can't know myself.

    And yet, I was right in the beginning.

    I did become too attached.

    It was real.

    It was the truth.

    I betrayed myself. I did something even knowing that I can't trust myself. And now what?

    And now I anticipate my heart shattered like so much glass. I wait for the pieces to fall into a dark abyss of despair. I'll venture quietly into the darkness to retrieve the pieces. I'll lock them into an impenetrable box and toss the key, and wait for the pieces to heal.

    And no one, no one will ever be let in. I'll go into that dark abyss where I fell and take my heart with me. And if you want my heart, you’ll have to fight me for it. My weapons are words, and fierce is my might. Do you dare fight me?

    Do you have a death wish?