Untitled

• Artist: Trixibelle Lee
• Description: We had to write a Sonnet in English today and this is mine. It's not very sonnet like since it doesn't have an ABAB rhyme scheme but my teacher liked it and I like it as well. I just want to find out what you guys think.
• Date: 03/04/2009
• Tags: untitled fear sonnet

I fear the light and the darkness within
I fear your voice and the touch of your skin
I fear my heart and thought of my life
I fear your words when they cut like a knife
I fear the silence and the words that are said
I fear being alive and I fear being dead
I fear my feelings and I fear my thoughts
I fear the lessons and the things being taught
I fear the summer and the touch of the sun
I fear so much I feel like I could run

But what I fear most…
What I fear most is the lack
And what I fear most now that you’re gone…is knowing you’re never coming back.

Comments

[lil_ecuador_WARior]

wow. . . GREAT JOB!!!!!!

[jgirl39]

This isn't a sonnet, it's a couplet.
I really like "I fear being alive...my thoughts."
The last line of the first part is a little forced - I think you should mention winter, since you wrote about summer in the previous line.
The very end - repetition is nice, but having "what I fear most" 2x is a little too much, imho. You could use the extra syllables to elaborate on "the lack."