My Grandfather's wake tomorrow and the Funeral Mass and the brunch after that. I don't know if I can do it. I broke down today durring nineth period, and I cried in the bathroom for like 10 minutes. Then I wrote a really shitty poem rather than classwork. And then on the late bus, I broke down again and cried all over Yami. And then she came over and I cried all over her more. I can't do this, I really don't think I can. I want my Papa back. I want him back and happy and healthy. And I want to tell him all the things I never did when he was alive. Like how much I really do love him. And how much I liked his hair, I don't know why, I just did. And how safe I always felt at their house before he and my Grandma got sick. And how much I miss eating dinner with them all the time. And how bad I feel for not visiting as much as I should have. And how bad I feel for not telling him how great of a person he is.
Sorry about this ramble. I just needed to get this out. :/ :[
[.Ichigo-Chan.] · Fri May 30, 2008 @ 02:42am · 1 Comments |