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i can see why people hate on screamo music.
some screams are ******** gay, imo.
just like with normal singing, there's different screams. good and bad.

- - -

these are REALLY gay lyrics,
but it's to make a point;

Is it really just another crush
Do you catch a breath
When I look at you
Are you holding back
Like the way I do
Cause I'm tryin, tryin to walk away
But I know this crush aint goin away, goin away

i remember that feeling so well. that high. that awkwardness i wouldn't let go of. the mystery.
going out of my way to meet a girl. flirting. the newness and freshness of something new.
i remember getting it with shanice, with desiree, with frankie, hell, a lot of girls.
i kind of miss the feeling.

but,
amy > that feeling.

- - -

at times,
i miss my promisciousity for that reason.
for the rush. different girls. getting attention. having fun. no strings. meeting new people.
i didn't ******** whore myself, and i wasn't a player. it is what it is.
it's an old lifestyle that could probably tempt me from time and time again. probably. probably not.
hell, i've ******** cheated on amy back in april.

but i sacrificed it. to stay with amy.
she, her and i. it's worth more than the 'fun'. it's more meaningful. life is better with her, and being in a serious relationship.
because flings aren't something you can fall into when you're broken. flings aren't going to listen.

two years and going.

- - -

what the ******** ever.
i won't mommy you.
because it really can work.
but things do take more than the purest passion.
relationships take more than just love.
it's that one thing. you can't put your finger on it.

i don't know.
i don't want to sound like a p***k or elitist for saying it,
but i don't think you can understand what a relationship really takes until you've withstood time.
you understand your partner in such a deeper way after being with them years together.
hell, even i have things to learn.

well. w/e.
/rant.

- - -

i want you to understand that teenage relationships CAN last.
sure, a lot of them don't. a ******** lot.
but i've seen some amazing couples. there's definitely potential.

- - -


this is why music has been so adored and labeled as passions for all time.
it can bring such emotion straight from your ******** soul.
my gosh.
i'm listening to augustana's boston.
mainstream-y song, but so beautiful.
and beautiful music,
is just incredible.
lyrics and instrumentals can create such a powerful experience.
i even feel different as a person, right now.