ever since i was four i wondered why i was born. i looked at how perfect my sister is and how my brother was following in her footsteps. i always thought to myself i cant do that. im not gonna turn out like them at all. my sister graduated with a full scholarship. and my brother got a scholarship to yale and turned it down just to stay close to home. and i would sit there and listen to my mom talk about her children 1 by 1. her First born that got a full scholarship to yale, her only son that so accepted at yale and then when she got to me she would call me her "oops child". and i always wondered why. the reason i thought about it so much was because i was always with her, doing anything she told me to do, kissing her a** at every moment i could. and when i realized that she always wanted to send me off with my father, i stopped. she asked me what happened and how come im not as close to her anymore.... i would never say anything back. i would roll my eyes and walk away. she always told me she knew everything, and thats where she's wrong. so now here i am....13 yrs old comtemplating suicide cuz i cant stand being here on the same planet as her anymore. No matter how hard i try EVERYTHING i do is always wrong. and now that i stopped caring i decided to make myself distant now shes telling me that im changin and not for the good way. but i hope she knows that she wont have to consider me a headache for too much longer..... And i swear on my life she will suffer more than i have my whole life..... twisted
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