One smile can mean so much to the world, and to me...to me, one smile from you means more than a hundred words ever could, more than any gift you could ever give me. That smile that shows that you're thinking of me, thinking of how special I am to you, and of how happy you are when you're around me, makes my life worth living.
And it saddens me that you show that smile so rarely now...I suppose I can't blame you, because I'm not as important to you as I was.
I read too much into the little things you do - that smile, the fact that (and I laugh as I write this) you moved me back into your top eight, you sharing the chair with me at your house, taking me grocery shopping with you...I want them to be more important than they are, and so I make them that important. And it hurts to remember that they aren't.
I have to fight so hard not to daydream of you before I fall asleep...I used to fall asleep imagining that I was in your arms, listening to you breathe. But now...now those once-pleasant imaginings torture me.
I wish I could have things back to where they were.
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Exodus
Here in the shadows I'm safe, I'm free...
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Strawberry Gashes
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