i woke up today at three am today (as i always do) thinking of Him. i ask myself and wonder " i wonder if he wakes up like this" , " i wonder how much he thinks of me". everytime i ask these mind bottling, heart aching questions, i cry a little bit. because i know that in the end, the wait will be worth it. During school i daydream and fantasize how my life would be being with him right now, this very moment! see just typing these very words is building my anticipation! i dream of him quite often, i talk to him when i can. and when we share feelings and thoughts and moments and everything thats invovled, i feel as if im hurting him, my state of mind and being i revolved around his very existance! And when i want to share my dreams with him...i cant because he tells me it hurts him in ways that it hurts me. Maybe im pushing him away while pulling him in? i cant explain it but i know for a fact hes mine!!! his every beat! every word.......everything! i know it may seem cliche, but if this is what im feeling right now, every day, every moment when i think of him, I know its something strong.
hades darkest fear · Fri Nov 26, 2010 @ 11:07am · 1 Comments |