I can't remember what my romantic aspirations were or are anymore. I have pushed them so far away so as to keep myself from getting let down, but now I have the possibility that they might get to come true... one by one? Please bear with me if they are unorganized or some have details while others do not:
Kiss on a Ferris Wheel - inspired by Santa Cruz Boardwalk as a kid
Swimming under a full moon together
receive a mixtape
cook together
receive a locket
Swim/Play in the ocean together
road trip
photo booth
ice cream fight - smearing or shoving into/onto each others' faces
receive a poem
receive a letter
cuddle under the stars
spend Xmas together
I don't know how to explain how he is different from anyone else that I have dated. It feels like everyone else up to this point was a training exercise and this was the real thing that I was prepping for. True, it is still very early and there are little things that are off but that is normal. Things are not supposed to be perfect. For instance, I spend most of my time with him instead of my own interests. That's normal. Another thing is that he snores and it drives me ******** crazy. He's also SUPER competitive, which I hate. He has only been bad once tho. I hate it because people tend to go overboard so that they are offensive when they get really competitive. They forget that there is another person on the other side and cut off their emotions so that the ambition and competitive drive to win are the only thing left. Blegh. Hate that. I really don't know how to pin down how this relationship is different from the others.
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Fragmented Self who wanders through life like a dreamer and wades through the river of dreams as though it were the only truth left in this world
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