Christmas came and went, and it's only worse now. I promised him I wouldn't talk to you anymore as long as we could work on our relationship. All that did was make me feel lonely again. And then, once he knew I wasn't talking to you anymore, he started using you against me. If life with him is so bad, why don't I move in with you. If he sucks so much, go talk to you. If I wanted someone who cared about emotions, I should've married you. I'm too needy. I'm too sensitive. I'm too emotional. I'm too touchy. It's only worse. I cried because I wanted to talk to you. I cried because I need to let you move on, and I can't. I cried because all I want is to love and be loved, and that's too much for him. I don't know what I'm going to do, but I can't stay here anymore. I wish I could let you be, but I keep thinking about you, and it's driving me crazy because I feel like all I am is this basketcase ex-girlfriend that you can't seem to get rid of. Probably because I am too needy. It was probably a mistake ever trying to talk to me again, because now I can't let you go. I just want to talk to you, but I can't expect you to be this knight in shining armor for me. Honestly, maybe I just want you to know. Just know that I still think about you. Just on a hope that you don't forget about me. Oh God, I just re-read this whole thing, and I sound so whiny and dramatic. Eeeeh. I miss you. That's it. That's why I'm mass texting you at nearly 2 o'clock in the morning. Sorry.
|