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Very impressed, this account is still existing.
I am existing as well, as should be clear from the entry here.
I think 19 years since i registered on here. So much stuff has happened.
Well, things are okay now, i managed to grow up a bunch and while i still have lots of mental issues theyre all mostly under not-exactly control but enough to just go ahead and do things.
Might update later, i dont know.
 Zadkiel · Sat Feb 12, 2022 @ 08:11am · 0 Comments |
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Don't save me from myself |
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There was a magician, who would wish to learn all there was to learn in the world.
In order to learn that, the magician had to go thru some very scary rituals, where the magician would have to risk everything that was good.
"You will never get something for nothing", was in the magicians head all the time.
But the magician also know that there was nothing, really, to get.
Still, it seemed rather wasteful to have so much and use it for nothing.
Because, being alive, is such a enormous gift? And you can't trade it for something less sucky, or at least something which sucks in a different way.
Anyway. So the magician was doing all these dangerous rituals, and a worried friend said, "Why are you doing this to yourself? What do you want to achieve?"
And the magician, knowing exactly what that meant. So replies, "Nothing."
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Im still offline, just logged in to post a silly tale biggrin
Zadkiel · Thu Oct 22, 2009 @ 05:02am · 0 Comments |
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So, I was like "Gee, what does it feel to live on the streets?"
So I did.
And it was good.
Living in the street is though, and it's not something I'm very good at, or as good as anybody can be anyway. I learned a lot. I missed being online the most.
I realized, I truly am unfit to live in the "real world", because I don't think that people IRL are strong enough to do the things they consider are the right thing.
I wasn't either.
I feel I am stronger now.
So, I don't know if I'll be "non-homeless", but at least for the next couple of days I'll live in a normal house. My aunt's.
Family life is very strange for me.
I truly liked living in the street, made me feel alive.
And God has been searching for me, but I don't think that we're ready to accept god. Because, in the end, god is in the TV. And in the microwave.
And, as we see it, god literally is everything. But we still consider ourselves agnostic. So. Life's been good to me, even though it's been harsh.
Some wise dude once said, "If a snake bites you, thank it."
So, thank you life, for sucking so much.
Zadkiel · Tue Nov 25, 2008 @ 10:56am · 0 Comments |
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I am currently living in Lagos de Moreno, Jalisco. This is in Mexico, natch.
I am currently something like half-employed. I am working doing video editing and selling hena tattoos, they last about 2 weeks and are pretty nice.
I also currently am working hard in improving my drawing style, you may look at some of my drawings in:
http://flickr.com/photos/omgsitszaidyohnoes
I also am more interested in photography lately, you may see (in the near future, perhaps) some pictures I've taken in that webpage.
Life is still as confusing as when I was 16, but now I have more experiences to guide me in my journey. This is a good thing.
Also, I love psychedelic drugs. I keep an eye on my usage, since I fear becoming an addict oder frying my brain. (But since my way of thinking is uncommon, it's hard to know whether I am getting weirder or not...)
Then, I am now living "on my own" (I have rented an apartment with other 3 dudes), and trying my luck at "living my own life".
So far, the results aren't conclusive; This means I don't know yet if I am able to live my own life or not.
Growing up hurts, but staying young hurts worse.
I still am as INFP as always.
I still think the world might be a pretty nice place to live, if I could do the right things.
There's one person whom I'd like to share my live with, but said person is very far away. I don't know if said person would want to be part of my life, since this person is also trying to live on sie's own.
Hmm.
I don't know what else would be relevant to put in here.
If you happen to have any question, feel free to ask. I will always try to answer anything you ask (even stupid questions.), please consider me as an approachable person.
Oh!
I also expanded my name, now my full real name is ZaidaZadkiel (no spaces, both Zs are in uppercase.), but you may still call me Zaidy, zaddy, you dumbass, etc.
This was because of a peculiarity of my brain chemistry while using psychedelics. I am fully aware this is utter nonsense, but I like it anyway. It's not like my life makes much sense...
This time I really have nothing more to say.
Love you all, even those whom I do not love,
ZaidaZadkiel
Zadkiel · Tue Sep 09, 2008 @ 01:08am · 0 Comments |
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is at
Barton 21001000.
Zadkiel · Fri Feb 02, 2007 @ 11:49pm · 1 Comments |
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I'm in the city of La Paz, which is in the state of Baja California Sur.
There is a beach here. and There, and over there too!
That's because it's a peninsula.
Zadkiel · Mon Jan 29, 2007 @ 01:01pm · 0 Comments |
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someone once promised me that things would be fine and things would get better.
I really trusted him.
Zadkiel · Mon Feb 20, 2006 @ 06:55am · 1 Comments |
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i ******** hate drama.
Zadkiel · Mon Feb 20, 2006 @ 06:04am · 0 Comments |
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