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she occupies my thoughts always though we broke up i still wish i could turn back time. turn it back to the past when i was still happy , my head buzzes with sadness lonelyness and darkness my love is undying. the sound if her sweet voice the cute laugh the smiles the sounds of her breathing even i miss it all i cant get her out of my head and its driving me mad i just want to go back to being together and not alone not by myself not unloved..... i miss you so very much my love and there isnt anything i can do about it i cant forget abut you.

i got my truck fixed after about 3 months of non-use im no longer dependant on my roommate for a ride to work and i managed to quiet the exhaust manifold some. i still need a new one though. i have found a girl i really like and who really likes me back so im at least happy for now.

not that the morose journal entries wont continue to pour out from my finger tips. but for now the lonliness is silenced and all is right in the world.

yeah so you know me, im either complaining or emphatically over dramatizing the whole lifes a bore thing, but im happy to say i like my new job that ive had for about 6 months now. i like where im at with gaming and the net once more and i have attracted the attentions of one of the damn sexiest females i know only sux she lives in another state. oh well lifes a b*tch then you die. i totally like the new chages that gaia as made and in general i like the street racing thing. not bad mad props to gaian programmers.

well this is me signing off for now ill keep posting new and more interesting journal entries hopefully.

enjoy existence suck heads!!! twisted burning_eyes

burning_eyes cheese_whine dramallama wahmbulance emo

just a small taste of whats to come

this life has seemingly good from bad to worse

how so you ask??

cause a friend of mine got herself into a bit of a sticky situation with a person she has talked to for over a year

why is this a problem you ask??

cause i dont know if i like the girl fully or not i may have only know her for a short time but im beginning to like her as possibly more than a friend redface

again you ask why is this a problem????

cause she loves another but likes me i dont know if it would ever escalate beyond likeing cause i cant hardly predict the outcome of this relationship but i do really like the girl. but as i sed i dont think shell ever be over the one she loves which is quite disheartening in my opinion really.

working sucks sleeping sucks playing video games sucks the internet sucks even eating sucks but for some strange reason talking to friends doesnt suck................as bad oh well i guess its just human nature to be bored with things some times

ok so basically i went shopping with the parental unit label B ( B short for B*tch) she dragged me to store after store in a futile attempt to plan a stupid halloween party and supply it with food needless to say she spent over 500 bucks between bulk food mine and her costumes and alcohol for jello shot (BTW she forgot the damn jello what a dork i swear) anyways she got a few things to make herself a clown for the party me im going as my version of a dynasty warriors royal gaurd ( one of the playable characters if you want pics let me know ill get em to ya) with a pair of baggy red pants that reach to my shoulders like a v neck vest combo a black shirt with slit baggy sleeves and a drab grey handled dragon katana which im thinking about spray-painting gold. it also has this plastic replica of a japanese royal gaurd helmet. hey i like it the red thing has little black dragons all over it it looks sweet!! xd xd blaugh

well im confident to say that so far my life is ok but its not perfect nor is anyone elses to be exact. everything is fine today but just wait it gets worse every day between the constant arguements between mom and ray (her live-in bf) and the fights between derek ( rays 11 y/o idiot son) and ray and mom it gets pretty hectic here