Me: I don't like being horny.
Me: Makes me feel like all these slutty a** whores who've harassed me in the past. Reminds me that a person can betray everything they believe in because their hormones are raging.
Me: I don't cyber because it seems trivial and insincere compared to the actuality of being with them in person.
Me: I don't drink because I don't like losing control or giving up my inhibitions.
Me: I don't like being influenced.
Me: And people wonder why I have psychological blocks about intimacy or sex...
Me: It makes me feel dirty and slutty, even if I know I'm not.
Me: It makes me self-conscious and doubt myself.
Me: Every time there's someone that I think I could love and overcome those blocks, I end up feeling their gradual decline in interest in me.
Me: That only compounds it.
Me: -shrug- Too serious of a topic.
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