The begining. The starting point, the point of origin. The place from which all comes. Mine comes from my name. I wanted only to hae a designation amngst these mortal being. I wasn't to place my life within these finite lifes. I wanted to shuck off this immortal shell, to embrace the failing society to give aid to these lives clinging desperately to their foresaken traditions and vows.
Even as death's long shadow bathed thier homes in eternal blackness they light candles and torches, finding the path just as easily.
I stayed deep within these shadows, the heavy veils not only around my body but my heart. Coating everything in darkness, turning white to grey and grey to black and black to nothingness.
How futile these lies we are holding to. If I see in shades of shadows these lives must being seeing in shades of dawn. They only want to see the blinding goodness here. But why? Because it is how it is.
The finites have alwys ben known to do so. The shortened life span allows for such things. They don't have an eternity to to feel guilty over past mistakes. They don't have the patients or time to stop and think of centuries in the future.
Finities. Limited. yet, they're boundless in energy and care. They have some many things that can contribute to us. Why are we denying them claim to eternity? Why are we so far above them that their rays of hope and joy cannot reach us?
This black veil, this dark heart. It is my limiter, my finite capacity.
I have eons to think about it and more eons to to rationalize. But then I'd be just like them. So ar from these finites to soak in their light, too far from dawn to ever truelly be awakened.
Finites. Limited.
Eternal. infinate.
Can the choices be so clean cut? Must we be one or the other? Can't there be a being of infinate knowldge that can also feel joy? Why can we not experience both dawn and dusk? Why must I remain in forever slumber, dreaming away my life as if I were a petulate child. Is there something that can cure this breaking heart? Are my only bandages to be the shadows of my world? The ghost that huant my waking dreams? Am I destined to forever repell the beaming light of these infinites I walk amongst?
I'm not the first to come here, so hy am I the first to want to stay here?
 Ray the Good Soldier · Wed Aug 22, 2007 @ 03:16am · 0 Comments |
