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They were in discreet places, areas that weren't looked at closely and in hiding places that people didn't normally bother going to unless it was important. Jiyong only happened to stumble upon them since they were also written everywhere within that notebook Seunghyun always scribbled in, the thing was that he accidentally knocked it over only to see that it had opened to a random page. Now you see, that notebook was a private, important notebook of Seunghyun's. No one was allowed or supposed to read it, nor touch it for that matter, unless absolutely necessary.

He had no idea Seunghyun would be so careless with such a prized possession but Jiyong wasn't complaining, although it was odd to see the notebook lying out within the open for everyone to grab. Jiyong bit his lip as he attempted to resist the urge of satisfying his curiosity, pointedly looking away from the pages as he picked it up carefully and made a quick inspection to make sure it wasn't damaged beyond repair. But as Jiyong glanced at the slightly glossy pages written all over with ink, his self restraint snapped and he gave in to his curiosity. He brought the notebook closer, reading the contents quickly so as to not get caught with the thing in his hands. Getting caught red handed was not a pretty thing, especially if it was Seunghyun who caught you. Many were quick to rat each other out whenever it came to this notebook.

At first, all he saw were insensible and somewhat illegible scribbles with a few cartoon drawings here and there. But the more he flipped through the pages of the slightly worn out notebook, the more he noticed certain words that were sticking out from the rest of the blocked text. Some words seemed to be scratched out, others bolded or underlined or some other type of emphasis put upon. But aside from the words, he also seemed to notice a number of drawings. A few of them were of a certain girl he never saw before others seemed to be of Seunghyun and the other band members.

Fascinated by the drawings and the writings or scrawling, whatever you want to call them, Jiyong continued to flip through the notebook in interest. There was one particular page in the near beginning that caught his eye, however. A picture of a very beautiful woman. A scratched out name was under the picture along with a few hearts. The strange thing was that this was perhaps the only picture within the entire notebook, or to his knowledge so far that is, and it was a slightly faded albeit somewhat still glossy picture who resembled someone he thought he was extremely vaguely familiar. Keeping that thought within the back of his mind for later reference, he continued to examine the page. That's when something clicked within his mind when he saw a partial word or perhaps name, he wasn't too sure. It was a picture of Seunghyun's ex-girlfriend.

The photo was well taken care of, that was for sure. And for some reason that gave Jiyong a pang of envious jealousy and he thought it was strangely unreasonable. For what reason did he have to be jealous of Seunghyun's lingering attachments with his ex?

But really, that particular photo wasn't the most important thing or the particular content that caught his eye the most. The one he was referring to earlier, the one found in many discreet and secret places, was found much later in the book, near the last few pages. Deciding to push back the feeling, he instead flipped through the notebook to the page he was last at.

After a few more pages of illegible writing of random things that may be important or perhaps not, but they certainly weren't pertinent for him to know he was sure, he stopped upon the page that was the most surprising thing. It brought a smile to his face at first. It was a picture of the family, the Big Bang family.

But the more he examined the page, the smile slowly disappeared. Despite all the loving scribbles and endearing gestures, something nagged on his conscious that something was amiss. Something seemed wrong, and it was a bit of an annoying feeling. Jiyong bit his lip as he thought of what could possibly be wrong. Well, if he thought about it, why was the notebook so important if all there was were random scribbles and writings and a picture of his ex-girlfriend?

Was it the fact that there was a picture of his ex-girlfriend in there? (The burning jealousy he had so far suppressed seemed to flare with a burning vengeance at the thought) Or perhaps it was because these so called 'scribbles' as Jiyong had dubbed them were actually important and meaningful to Seunghyun himself? (That seemed like a logical idea). Or then again, perhaps it's because of the picture of his now family (Big Bang), too embarrassed for people to see or know that he cares about them so much more than he's let on?

Many questions brewed within his head, but nothing gave him an answer. You could call it intuition or something, but something within Jiyong told him to turn just a few more pages, and perhaps then he'd find his answer. Jiyong obliged.

Jiyong slowly and softly turned a few more pages, simply skimming through the pages, Jiyong noticed that they were actually more or less all completely legible, and they also sounded/seemed as if they were words of a confession. Or perhaps they were words that were to be said to a lover? He doesn't really know but Jiyong can feel his heart clench a bit as he felt his stomach flop uncomfortably.

Deciding not to read in-depth since it really did seem as if he was invading Seunghyun's privacy more so than he was earlier (not to mention it seemed much too personal for him to read), Jiyong turned one more page. And what he saw was quite a bit of a shock.

A bit might be an understatement though, as it was more like a huge surprise that left Jiyong's mouth hanging slightly open and caused him to take a sharp intake of breath, nearly dropping the notebook in the process.

What exactly had he seen? It was a picture of him. It was just like the picture he'd seen with Seunghyun's ex-girlfriend photo. But, why was there an individual photo of him in the notebook?

The picture itself was not even the most surprising factor. It was the inscription written all over, so much to the point that it seemed as if the paper was bleeding black ink. It was surprising that the phrase that was written so many times could be read so clearly and it was such a heartbreaking phrase. A line out of his own song, Heart breaker. It brought tears to his eyes, it made him feel as if his heart was stabbed by a dozen sharp knives, digging deep and painfully. It made his stomach fall upon the ground and flop dead, leaving a stinging pain and dull regret within his veins.

Inscribed, or rather, written everywhere within the notebook, was the line:

You're my heart's tragedy.